melting

Williamsburg, Virginia is a hole of despair and a vacuum that sucks up all forward motivation and positive energy and spits it out on the other side--somewhere I'm not.

I want nothing more than to feel the same sort of hope that I felt in the middle of the summer; I knew where I was going in life and that it would all be okay. A month later and only two weeks into the semester, I'm not so sure.

Obviously, I am going to be fine. Sadly, though, this town is 0 for 4 with providing non-awkward social situations, time to spend with people who are actually worthwhile, things to do on a regular basis that don't suck, and meaningful ways to spend time alone.

I actually think I might go to the gym now, even though I should be doing work. Sitting in the sauna and then taking a cold shower may be the only way to get rid of the grossness I feel from being outside all day doing sorority recruitment.

My friend called and seemed upset. He wanted to talk. I've felt this nagging nausea in the bottom of my stomach since then; I'm worried about what might be going on. I never want to think the worst, but I always do.